How do you respond to the rumours that you got Woolridge Drunk in order to beat him during the Garrat Park match?!
That hurts a little. I brought the Port along as gesture, a throw back to yesteryear, to honour the boule gods if you like. We both had equal rations and if anything I think Port radically increases your BSA (Boule Spacial Awareness).
There is talk of the final shot of the game, not only being quite exquisite, but also a little supernatural. Any thoughts on this?
We were playing an LBJ (Long Bearded Jack) match where the J was around 15 meters from our position. Boules were being tossed high and far, we shook the local avian nesters from their trees as we launched our orbs into orbit. We were at best meters away from the jack when Darren tossed his final sphere and secured what was surly the winning throw, his boule was about 12 inches away from the jack and at that distance it was an incredible throw. I took a breath, tossed my orb and produced a a 15 meter kisser out of nowhere. There was no supernatural intervention. It was the moment when Woolridge realised he was in the presence of an incredible new talent on the scene.
Why do you think the mosquitos were so big in this small slice of park life in South west london?
It's because we were in Garrett Park, it's where Pat Garrett infamously shot and killed Billy the kid. I imagine the mosquito population still thrives on his festering, rotting corpse.
Dr. Moss is apparently very impressed with you lighting up a Cuban cigar the instant you won. Is this something your fans can get used to?
Yes, for big grudge matches this will be a regular celebration. For lesser scalps I will break out a pack of Café Crémes or some Spider-Man candy sticks.
Are you planning to steal Dr. Moss' solid housewive's following this season? Do you think they are looking for something a little fresher?
When I play Extreme Boule I take my wedding band off and play as a single boy. That's all I'm saying ladies.
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