12.4.15

Burrow's Masterclass

G. Burrows   21
T. Wort          5

This was a first to 21 long player on  Wort's home ground, Burrows having travelled from Oxfordshire. A quick check of the record books shows Burrows had never beaten Wort. In fact he had never before scored 21 - Wort has on 11 occasions.This was surely as predictable as an Extreme Boule match can get?

Burrow's takes aim

The terrain was lumpy, the turf producing unforgiving, unpredictable bounces. Whoever could adjust first was sure to take the spoils.
Burrows edged into a 6-4 lead, the ale easing his progression, flattening the uneven turf in his mind's eye. Then the decisive moment came. Burrows produced a glorious kisser near some bluebells, the cat very much licking his bacon. This was a psychological turning point for Wort - he was mentally deflated, retreating into a world of botchy boule. And so followed the best boule of Burrow's life - he scored 15 of the next 16 available points to cruise to an incredible 21-5 victory. For Burrow it means a jump up the World rankings, whilst Wort is left eating a pickled egg in a sauna.



Burrow's the 2015 World Champion? That doesn't show too far fetched on this showing!

7.4.15

Breaking News...

Latest breaking news from the world of extreme boules in Scotland!!! A new prodigy has arrived to our noble sport. Rowan 'Schiehallion' Topalian played and convincingly won her first game aged just 6 days!
A classic old school indoor first to 7 match was played on the 30th March, In which she beat her opponent (Stanley Topalian) 7-0 humiliating him publicly and making him the laughing stock of Succoth.
"I haven't been sleeping well recently" Topalian senior muttered as he departed the field of play, disgraced....
Waterman is said to be 'unfazed' by the emerging wunderkind....

5.4.15

Lunar letdown

Location: Southbourne, Dorset

Consumables: imperial Russian stout & Cuban cigars

Dangers and annoyances: lunar Rays and grass stains

Extreme rating: 1*

———

Match results:

D. Woolridge 8
A. Betts 4
M. Hopkins 4

Played by the light of a near full moon (and a halogen patio bulb) the match saw all three players shooting some serious botchy ball.

That didn't stop Woolridge snatching all the points he could gather whilst betts and Hopkins fiddled with their runcible spoons.